Road map to assist in creating boundaries
B- Behave in ways that demonstrate your authentic self. Does Saying yes enable me to show up impeccably? If not, it’s unacceptable, and the answer is no.
O- Own your power to make decisions. You always have a choice. Most importantly, you have the right to change your mind and renegotiate.
U- Understand that not everyone will be happy with your yes or no’s. Their reaction is not your responsibility. You may risk disappointing others or even making them angry. Your responsibility is to be true to yourself. You are 100% responsible for your 50% in any relationship.
N- Non-negotiable. Get clear about what you are not willing to waver on. This insight will make your decision timeless and perhaps less painful for everyone involved.
D- Dedicate to self-preservation Ask yourself, will saying yes to this leave me mentally, physically and/or spiritually depleted? If so, the answer is NO – This is a sentence, by the way. Once you declare, “No, that does not work for me,” you do not owe an explanation. I am sure we can all recall when we said yes, when we meant to say no, and the detrimental results that we created for ourselves.
A-ASK for what you want and need. Communicate clearly, so you are understood. Do not assume others can read your mind and know what you need/want. Accept that we all have our limits.
R-Respect your decisions and hold the line. Wavering on your yes or no confuses others. It also creates a space of blurred boundaries which often leave us feeling taken advantage of or disrespected. Remember: We teach people how to treat us by our boundaries.
Y- You, You matter! The yes or no should not infringe on your personal set out standards. You are entitled to self-interest and adopting the motto: “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.”